Original photography, served fresh, and shit I find funny, served lukewarm.


pringlesaremydivision replied to your post: why do people obsess about gender iden…

*snort* oh my god, people are fucking idiots. did she respond?

she just kind of smiled, it’s like, it wasn’t overtly unpleasant or anything, just so very unnecessary, you know? like there was a huge rack of halloween costumes in the next aisle so i could put my dog in a godzilla outfit for a laugh, but i shouldn’t put him in a feminine collar because it might hurt his manly dignity

why do people obsess about gender identifying their DOGS

i took archie to petsmart today to get him a new harness and he was happily pulling shit off the rack while a lady was cooing over how beautiful he was (true) and how smart (sure, if you say so) when he tried to get at a pink one and she was like, “oh, buddy, you don’t want a pink leash! that’s so girly!”

i just stared at her blankly and said “you know he’s color blind, right”

Played 54,833 times







here’s beethoven’s moonlight sonata rendered in airhorns. you know, if that was something you needed

I will now forever imagine this as the background music whenever there’s a scene in a movie that highlights PROFOUND, GRITTY MANPAIN.

omg rachael we need to include that in a film at some point




and then everything will go dim save for a single overhead light above the actor 

Stubble McManpain sits on a wooden chair in his kitchen, breathing deeply in an attempt to manfully hold in his tears.

CUE: Manpain Sonata

INTERCUT: Exterior, street. Stubble McManpain falls slowly to knees as woman in scarlet high heels walks slowly away. Her hair whips in the wind. PS reaches out toward her uselessly. She glances over her shoulder just as, in super slow motion, she is plowed down by a cement mixer.

Stubble McManpain’s kitchen grows progressively dimmer, save for a single light illuminating his craggy, manly face filled with craggy, manly pain. The light is revealed to be the light of the freezer, from which he withdraws a pint of Chunky Monkey.

INTERCUT: One of the scarlet stiletto shoes tumbling across the sidewalk in super slow motion. Stubble McManpain is seen, indistinctly, howling his agony in the background. A beagle on a leash pauses to nose at the shoe curiously.

Manpain Sonata intensifies as Stubble McManpain begins to eat the Chunky Monkey with a large, manly spoon and sob. Half-melted ice cream dribbles slowly down his chin.

iwanttotieyourshoe replied to your post: prosecutor:would you mind stating your…

Scary! My husband was listening to that song earlier tonight!!! I remember listening to that song on my WALKMAN! :)

that’s amazing, now i’m dying that any two people on earth were listening to the fine fresh musical stylings of tag team today


and scene

(via wearitcounts)

honest to god, i woke up in the middle of the night thinking about this and went, “this is worth every follower i will lose” and then cackled myself back to sleep

guixonlove replied to your post: guixonlove replied to your post: guixo…

You are just so precious. Seriously, grilled cheese is the only thing that I can cook. Everything else, I manage to screw up royally. I once burned a frozen lasagna in the oven. I’m just terrible at everything cooking related, really.


so husband does the “cooking,” but that actually means he just makes frozen lasagnas and pizzas and those skillet things you just throw in a pan and stir around, because i just